Well-Rounded Geekery

3liza:

junglejim4322:

junglejim4322:

Friendships as a teenager: we used to talk 5 hours every night now it’s down to 3… are we still friends 🤔? I wonder if they don’t like me anymore

Friendships as an adult: omg I’ve finally cleared up 20 minutes of my schedule to talk to my friend I haven’t spoken to in 4 months #bffs #we will find eachother in every life

I’m still so taken aback by people in the notes who claimed you need to be talking to people weekly or even daily to consider them your friend. how many people do you know? As an adult I feel like talking every day is sustainable with one person maybe 2 or 3 if your circumstances somehow are really conveniently aligned. yeah there’s people I talk to often there’s also people I don’t talk to for 6 months because there’s no way we’ll be able to coordinate time and energy and I still consider them my friends because this is real life and there isn’t a stardew valley esque hearts system based off of how many interactions we had this month

just fyi by the time youre in your 30s, most of the people you would call to help you cover up a murder are the people you text about twice a year. it’s specifically because you can maintain the relationship on two texts a year that they are your closest friends. the reason everyone’s interpersonal relationships are so unstable in your teens is because everyone’s “best friends” are almost entirely circumstantial. you won’t actually know which of those people are in for the long haul until the relationships have been stress tested by distance, conflict and silence.

drogonea:

turnabout:

spytap:

ignescent:

kiwianaroha:

azureleon:

tilthat:

TIL that a recent study out of the University of Kansas found that it takes about 50 hours of socializing to go from acquaintance to casual friend, an additional 40 hours to become a “real” friend, and a total of 200 hours to become a close friend.

via reddit.com

Socializing speedrun (Any %)

This is why it was so much easier to make friends when you were in school; you were trapped with those people all day Monday to Friday. It’s OK that it’s harder to make really good friends now that you’re an adult

Yes, this! It’s also why regular get together are so useful. If you want to make friends as an adult? Join a book club, go to a craft meet up, find an excuse to hang out w/ approximately the same people once a week for a couple of hours. As you get to know them, invite them out other places. Yes, it’s a pain to have to do the work to socialize, but if you want the friends, you have to trap yourself with the other people.

Reblogging for all my mutuals who have asked “Why is it so hard to make friends as an adult?”

“if you want the friends, you have to trap yourself with the other people” sounds so sinister. 

It’s also why so many people lose their entire social network when they retire or start working from home. Making friends outside of work is vital to your own survival when your main access to socialization is controlled by your employer.

inkskinned:

but you see her on instagram and it was never really said that you guys aren’t friends but one day she stopped answering and you stopped texting and it’s not like the wound is a cavern but it is a diagram of what if in red letters. you want to tell her nice lipstick that’s a good color but the last time you spoke it was stilted and awkward 

how do you say goodbye, you know? it’s not an unfriend and block kind of situation. but you watch the people you once loved go on and have a life and you’re outside of it. and it’s bittersweet because of course it’s okay that you’re both thriving. but she used to be who you’d call if you needed to cry. she used to be who’d you’d be binge watching the new series with. you used to be hers, in a way, even if that way wasn’t permanent. and now she’s someone else and so are you and your friendship is clicking heart shapes next to pictures where she smiles next to people you’ve never met. you know where her birthmark is. she knows where you’ve buried your dead.

the poets and the singers and the authors write about romantic love when it ends. but nobody tells you how to get over a friend.

idiopathicsmile:

look, fandom as a whole certainly has its own built-in biases and problems that need to be addressed 

but like

every so often i think about all of the deep, nurturing lifelong friendships that only ever happened because one day two internet strangers were like ‘oh hey, we agree on which fictional characters should kiss!’

people who are right now helping each other survive via connections they initially forged by liking the same sailor moon girl or something

the internet is a goddamn garbage pit but it is also a goddamn miracle

gayinsect:

im pretty sure bromance is the perfect example of how embarrassingly fragile masculinity is. you know what a female bromance is called? a friendship 

thingsamylikes:

tastefullyoffensive:

[mrlovenstein]

I find this method works well for me.

boxlunches:

trojanphoenix:

heatherbat:

aquaticallyinclined:

“When they were little girls, they decided that they would be best friends forever. A whale never forgets a promise.” -Anneliese Juergensen

i have now died. of joy.

I don’t think I’ve seen art of an old mermaid (mermatron? mergranny?) before.

I love it!

Oh look it’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen

lieutenantsulu:

true bonding is when you and your friends are all angry about the same thing

theroguewriter:

the-slanderous-slander:

netherworldvineyard:

netherworldvineyard:

a thank you card for cypress_tree, my internet-fandom-writing friend, who has been a source of creative inspiration and Hufflepuffian support since our happy online meeting, and who gives possibly the most wonderful birthday presents I’ve been lucky enough to receive

and I thought maybe ‘net friendship was sentiment other people might share <3

one morning reblog~

Yesyesyes

Some of my best friends live on the other side of the world. Internet friends are a generational thing, I think. Our parents just don’t get it because they never experienced it.

I literally just got teary-eyed.

grumpys:

i hate when you’re not in the same mood as your friend like when you want to slay your enemies and feast on their flesh and your friend wants to dance in a field of daisies and sing for the sake of singing like no stop that grab a pitchfork